i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
