the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
We're too hungover to prance.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
