where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize
