next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
