belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Randomize
