My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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