i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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