we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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