we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
