She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You are the jesus of drinking
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
