If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Randomize
