that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
