ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
handjob tips. give me some.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
