His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
