i just google imaged poop.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize