i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize
