Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
How external is "for external use only"?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
