i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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