Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
