The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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