oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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