and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
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