escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
