good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
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