Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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