new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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