Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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