yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize