Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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