just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
