theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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