Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
