well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize