Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
