We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
The best revenge is premature balding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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