Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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