Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
