I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
