chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
