So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize