I accidentally had phone sex last night
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
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