the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
