After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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