I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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