We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
