Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building. http://tfl.nu/he38
  Replies (5) Good night (894) Bad night (1904)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you http://tfl.nu/tpo5
  Replies (30) Good night (13689) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  you dont need a face to have sex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh. (1-630): you dont need a face to have sex http://tfl.nu/3vud
  Replies (44) Good night (4491) Bad night (873)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good http://tfl.nu/mzsl
  Replies (8) Good night (2978) Bad night (1142)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom. http://tfl.nu/d1jb
  Replies (9) Good night (869) Bad night (3005)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him http://tfl.nu/k8ud
  Replies (25) Good night (1574) Bad night (6470)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting. http://tfl.nu/w8rn
  Replies (9) Good night (1257) Bad night (6911)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note http://tfl.nu/2uyq
  Replies (5) Good night (4203) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle. http://tfl.nu/a803
  Replies (2) Good night (881) Bad night (429)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine" http://tfl.nu/ib5o
  Replies (6) Good night (934) Bad night (449)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara. http://tfl.nu/jqcr
  Replies (13) Good night (811) Bad night (1372)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library. http://tfl.nu/9n29
  Replies (12) Good night (909) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night. http://tfl.nu/aqrx
  Replies (3) Good night (202) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all. http://tfl.nu/k6ec
  Replies (1) Good night (441) Bad night (192)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library http://tfl.nu/iddb
  Replies (5) Good night (276) Bad night (389)

Randomize