At least make sure they are 18
Why
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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