I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize