I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
