I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
