I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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