People in love make me want to vomit
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
